Exuma: Come for the Pigs, Stay for the Fish in the Beauty Salon
I got a message from my sister saying, “Hey, my birthday’s coming up, and I want to go swim with the pigs. You want to come?”
I called her.
“You mean swim with the dolphins, right?”
“No. Pigs. You know how much I love pigs, and you can swim with them in Exuma.”
Exuma?
Now you’re talking. I’m in.
The pigs? TBD.
Exuma had never been on my bucket list the way it had been on my sister’s, but one look at the pictures and suddenly I was paying attention.
I’d read that astronauts have described the Exumas as one of the most recognizable places on Earth from space thanks to that almost ridiculous turquoise water. One astronaut reportedly called it “the most beautiful place from space.”
Well, that settled it. Apparently, NASA was now helping plan my vacations.
There would be seven of us on this trip. Our surrogate French sister shares a birthday with my sister, so she and her family were flying in from Nice. With three kids under twelve in the mix, we opted for an Airbnb and a very large rental car.
We found a roomy waterfront house with its own white-sand beach and tiki hut. I immediately claimed the covered porch for morning coffee and mentally reserved the tiki hut for sunset cocktails.
We weren't going to be racing around Exuma collecting restaurants and resorts. We had a house on the water, three kids, a kitchen, and enough scenery outside the back door to make leaving seem slightly unnecessary.
Except, of course, there were pigs to swim with.
Iguana Island — The Dragon-Like Guardians of the Exumas
We had one full day of adventure planned by boat, and our captain met us at the dock promptly at 9 a.m. With three kids under twelve, the day's agenda was snorkeling, sand-dollar collecting, lunch, and—lest anyone forget—the pigs.
This was the big day.
Our first stop was “Iguana Island,” officially known as Leaf Cay. The island had once been owned by actor Nicolas Cage, who reportedly had plans to build a luxury home there until the rather important discovery that it was inhabited by a large population of endangered Northern Bahamian rock iguanas.
You can’t make this stuff up. It sounds like the plot of a Nicolas Cage movie.
He ultimately sold the island, allowing the iguanas to remain in possession of their very expensive Bahamian real estate.
Good guy move.
I don’t think any of us were prepared for what happened when we arrived. We stepped off the boat onto a sandy beach surrounded by rocky terrain, and, as if someone had yelled “ACTION,” iguanas came scrambling toward us from every direction.
They knew something we didn't.
Breakfast had arrived.
Fortunately, the captain had come prepared with leafy snacks, and these spiky little dragons were ready for them. At least we hoped it was the lettuce they were after.
We did have three small children with us.
Pig Beach — The Moment My Sister Had Been Waiting For
This was the whole reason my sister had engineered the trip, and she was practically vibrating as we approached.
Our captain had timed it perfectly—early enough to arrive before the pigs became sun-tired and cranky.
Apparently even Bahamian pigs have a limit.
As the boat approached, they started wading out to greet us like regulars who'd spotted the waiter carrying appetizers.
I’ll admit it: it was pretty spectacular.
We climbed off the boat and waded toward shore while piglets ran around the beach, and the larger pigs worked the crowd for snacks.
And judging by my sister’s face, it was every bit the bucket-list moment she had imagined.
Fine.
The pigs were winning me over.
Thunderball Grotto — The James Bond Cave That Feels Unreal
Our next stop was Thunderball Grotto, the famous underwater cave featured in the James Bond movie Thunderball.
The water was a little choppy that afternoon, and with three kids in tow, getting everyone off the boat involved considerably less James Bond and considerably more careful shuffling.
But once we slipped through the opening of the cave, everything changed.
The world went quiet.
Sunlight poured through openings in the roof, hitting the water and illuminating the fish beneath us like spotlights. For a few minutes, there was nothing to do but float and stare. This was one place where I wished I'd planned to dive. Watching divers disappear into the deeper pockets of the grotto immediately put it on my next-time list.
By then we'd already managed iguanas, pigs and a James Bond cave before lunch.
Exuma was showing off.
So, we did the sensible thing and went looking for a rum cocktail.
Our captain steered us toward Black Point and Lorraine’s Café, one of those breezy island places where the tables practically sit on the shoreline, and the rum punch tastes exactly like vacation should.
Then, as if the day hadn't already delivered enough wildlife, a massive turtle glided past the dock.
The kids were in the water approximately three seconds later.
Sand Dollar Beach — Where the Day Slowed Down Before Getting Weird Again
After lunch and our surprise turtle encounter, we climbed back aboard and headed for Sand Dollar Beach—the kind of place that looks Photoshopped even when you're standing in it.
The water was so shallow and clear that we could walk hundreds of feet offshore and still be only ankle-deep. White-gold sandbars stretched across the water like runways.
We wandered around collecting sand dollars so white and perfect they barely looked real.
By this point, the kids were exhausted. Iguanas, pigs, cave swimming, and turtle chasing can do that.
Which meant it was finally the adults' turn.
Our captain took us into the waters near David Copperfield’s private island, where one of the strangest sights in the Exumas waits on the ocean floor: a full-scale replica of a Steinway concert grand piano constructed of stainless-steel with a mermaid sitting on top.
Because apparently a piano on the bottom of the Caribbean wasn't peculiar enough on its own.
Dropping beneath the surface and watching it emerge from the blue was surreal—beautiful, eerie, and just bizarre enough to be unforgettable.
Exactly my kind of tourist attraction.
Tropic of Cancer Beach — The Perfect Day That Turned into the Quirkiest Adventure
The next morning, we loaded everyone into the SUV and headed for Pelican Beach on Little Exuma, better known as Tropic of Cancer Beach.
And this was the water.
The most exquisite turquoise I had ever seen. Not turquoise-ish. Not Caribbean blue. Turquoise. The kind of color you assume has been enhanced when you see it in photographs.
Against the blinding white sand, it almost didn't look real.
Standing there, I finally understood what those astronauts were talking about.
We put up a tent for shade and settled in for a proper beach day—the kind where nobody needs an itinerary, and the most pressing decision is whether it's worth getting out of the water for another drink.
Eventually hunger won.
We headed to Santana’s Bar & Grill, reportedly one of Johnny Depp's hangouts while filming Pirates of the Caribbean. It was exactly what I wanted it to be: a rustic, laid-back wooden shack perched above that ridiculous turquoise ocean.
I could have pitched a hammock and moved in.
But then we wandered next door to Mom’s Bakery.
And this is where the day took a turn.
A sweet local woman sat outside the little shack as though she'd been waiting for us. Inside were warm pineapple upside-down cakes, rum cakes and other freshly baked treats. Naturally, we bought everything that seemed remotely necessary.
Which was most of it.
Now we had dessert. We decided a lobster dinner back at the house would be perfect.
“Mom” pointed across the street and told us the man who lived there was a fisherman and sold his catch from his home.
Of course he did.
So off we went, knocking on a stranger's front door in the Bahamas, asking whether he happened to have any lobster for sale.
A little sketchy?
Perhaps.
Did that stop us?
Absolutely not.
He took us around back to a small hut, where we proceeded to pick out our lobsters as though we were choosing kittens. We also wanted some fresh fish. No problem, he told us. His wife had some.
Excellent.
Where?
At her beauty salon.
I'm sorry—what?
And that is how our little Exuma grocery run ended—with us walking into a hair salon and buying fresh fish from a cooler.
There are vacations where you make an 8 p.m. reservation at a Michelin-starred restaurant. And there are vacations where you buy dinner from the local beauty salon.
I know which story I'd rather tell.
That night we ate our lobster, fresh fish, and Mom's cakes back at the house.
Nobody got a haircut.
George Town and Chat 'N' Chill
George Town deserves some wandering time of its own. Everything moves a little slower there, and after a few days in Exuma, you stop wondering why everyone isn't in more of a hurry and start wondering why you ever were.
We strolled along the waterfront and wandered through the Straw Market, a cluster of colorful stalls filled with handmade straw bags, baskets, carved-wood trinkets, and island souvenirs. Local women weave, sell their wares, and chat with visitors, and it's wonderfully old-school—the kind of place where you can easily spend more time talking than shopping.
From there, we headed for the water taxi.
Chat 'N' Chill, the famous beach bar on Stocking Island, had been on our list from the beginning. There are no cars and no roads; you arrive by a short water-taxi ride from Great Exuma.
And the name pretty much covers the agenda. Open-air food and drink huts. Volleyball. Kids running into impossibly clear water.
Cold drinks. Bare feet.
And stingrays.
They glide right along the shoreline, drawn by scraps of fresh conch tossed into the water after the conch is cleaned. Just another completely normal afternoon in Exuma.
On Sundays, Chat 'N' Chill also hosts its famous pig roast starting around noon. We missed it.
Considering the number of pigs already involved in this vacation, perhaps that was for the best.
A Few More Tracey’s Tastes Stops
Splash Beach Bar — Located at Hideaways, with ocean views and rope swings for bar stools. Because apparently sitting normally at a bar is terribly overrated. Challenge yourself to swing in, grab your drink and retain both your dignity and your cocktail.
Shirley’s — In the famous Fish Fry area, inside a colorful Bahamian-style house. Don't miss the coconut grouper. It's popular, so you may wait a bit for a table.
You're on island time now. Deal with it.
Peace & Plenty — An old-school Bahamian icon overlooking Elizabeth Harbour. You don't have to be a hotel guest to stop in for a drink, and it's a great option later in the evening for live music or the piano lounge.
So, About Those Pigs...
Funny enough, I came to Exuma because my sister wanted to swim with pigs.
And yes, the pigs were pretty great.
But when I think about Exuma now, they're only one piece of it.
I remember iguanas scrambling over rocks, sunlight pouring through the roof of Thunderball Grotto, a piano sitting impossibly on the bottom of the sea, and water so turquoise that it finally made sense that astronauts could recognize this place from space.
I remember buying lobster from a fisherman behind his house and following directions to his wife's beauty salon because apparently that's where you go when you need fresh fish for dinner.
Mostly, I remember how wonderfully unpolished it all felt.
Exuma wasn't a trip filled with reservations, hotel bars and carefully planned dinners. We had a house by the water, kids running around, a boat for the day, rum cocktails, spectacular beaches and absolutely no idea where the next adventure might come from.
Sometimes that's enough.
As for swimming with the pigs?
Okay, Mel. You were right.
